You may not believe this, but some days it’s really hard being me. I am a self-confessed introvert, clumsy and on the best of days see everything a little left of normal. How do I deal with being me? Well, it hasn’t always been this easy, and I can honestly say looking back, I probably didn’t always handle it well, but I’ve learned some since the beginning, accepted the rigid parts, softened the pointy parts, and along the way, I grew used to myself. How? By defining who I am in my own terms. I took the time to dwell on what I value and considered what makes up the essence of who I am. Don’t get me wrong, as I grew in wisdom, I would have to occasionally reassess my core values, because if you are spiritually growing, your values may change, but the point is, I didn’t remain static and glued to one spot. We should always allow ourselves space to grow, to improve, to become wiser. Want to know a few truths I’ve learned? Well if you do, onward ho!
Most of all, be honest and open about yourself and your limitations. We’re all imperfect, if you feel ashamed or insecure about any aspect of yourself and you feel that you have to hide those parts of you, whether physically or emotionally then you need to come to terms with yourself and realize these are probably not flaws a’tall. Hug these oddities close because they are the gifts that make you the unique wonderful individual you are destined to be and are. Be honest with yourself, but don’t beat yourself up, big difference. And while you’re at it, apply this philosophy to others, as well. There is a difference between being critical and being honest; learn to watch the way you say things to yourself and others when being honest. Just because you believe what you are saying or feeling is honest doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not hurtful or even crucial that it be said.
A big step in my growth was to stop worrying about the worst that could happen in social situations. Dimes to donuts, in my case at least, the worst usually happened anyway. How did I learn to relax? You may be surprised, but once you realize that at some point you are going to do something like trip over you own two feet, land on your arse knocking over the bean dip so it lands with a plop in your lap during the party, the actual event is anticlimactic, and face it, kind of funny too. Learn to laugh at yourself both when it happens and afterward. Turn it into a funny story that you can share with others. It lets them know that you’re not perfect and makes you feel more at ease, too. I’ve even heard it’s an attractive quality for someone to be able to laugh at themselves and not take themselves too seriously!
Take from? Yes, if you want one. Interesting weekend I had. Taylor is a great guy, and lo and behold Jay’s easing back into the picture, so for the first time in a long time, I’ve a few options to stress and angst over. Oh wait, that wasn’t it. Take from? Develop and express your individuality. Whether it’s your sense of style, or even your manner of speaking, whatever it is, be proud of it. Value the person you are, follow your own style, love your own personality, and embrace your flaws; we all have them. That way when you reach the point in life where you have options, you can have them because of whom the real you is. You will be able to consider them and enjoy them and know they are truly there for the real you and not for some made up personality of a person you are pretending to be. Just a little thought, take them or discard as you will, I just wanted to throw it out here because like my dragon besty likes to remind me, I like to live my life by word and peace.