Deep Thoughts in the Shallow End of My Mind

Deep Thoughts in the Shallow End of my MindHair: Dura, Girl51 **New* . Jewelry: Alienbear, Almas II .

I don’t normally do these kinds of things, but Strawberry Singh got me to thinking about it on her blog, so I thought I’d give it a go.

1. Regardless of your current number, how old do you actually feel? – I have always felt, and I suppose acted a lot younger than I am age-wise, but through life experience and always being a thinker and watcher, I have often been told I have an “old soul.” I think it’s just I am more of a mellow person than most, not prone to extremes in anything, but if they want to call me one, I’ll wear it. Being thrown into menopause prematurely has offset my physical quality of life a bit and my spiritual identity, since I’ve had to rethink my future but emotionally I am probably still that neurotic, confused relationship-ly challenged Cao I’ve always been. Don’t believe me? Just ask Dr. Ben. In the words of my mother, “the man is a saint!”

2. Which is worse, failing or never trying? Never trying, failings are the linchpins that hold together the links of our successes. Neither is mutually exclusive. It is seldom that we get things perfect the first time and the failures along the way give us the understanding and ability to thrive on the successes.

3. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? – I don’t think I would change much at all. I think I would probably appreciate “moments” more, breathe a little deeper, love a little harder and learn a little more. Oh and start researching cryogenics. 😉

4. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? I’d like to think I was raised to do the right thing, being fair and ethical is a deep part of my psyche. To me integrity is doing the right thing without expecting anyone to know I did. But I always try to do things right as well, I know when I am having issues in SL and my photographs are crap, I feel pretty crappy posting them.

5. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? – I hate to say this, but it’s been said I am the “g” word and feck it all, I do worry sometimes about things like unwritten words (they always come in the middle of the night when I try to sleep) and unsolved problems. But would I want to be a joyful simpleton? Probably not. It’s all these quirks and nuances that make me who I am and a large part of that is my love affair with knowledge, especially words. At this point, I’ve lived with me so long I can find happiness in my quiet seriousness.

6. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? – This question caused me a moment’s pause actually. Have I been the kind of friend I want as a friend? Yes, definitely. I am bookish and solitary and a bookish and solitary person would make an excellent friend. But I think the question is intended have I been the kind of friend most friends would want me to be and then I’d have to admit, probably not. As an introvert I probably don’t friend too well. Don’t get me wrong, I love and adore so many people, but the close ones, there aren’t too many of those.

Deep Thoughts in the Shallow End of my Mind Dress: [[Masoom]], Beyonce **Singer Icon Fair** . Bag: E-clipse, Astralia .
7. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? – This has been one of my mantra’s in any Second Life drama and I’ve commented about it on several occasions. It’s this: If you are angry about something, so angry you want to rant and rave, put it to the test before you open your mouth. Is it something you will care about 3 months from now? How about 5 years? Better yet, when you are 60, is it a big deal then? If not, let it go, life is too short to be buried under hate.

8. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? – The moment in time, the millisecond it takes to share a wordless look between lovers, you know the one, where they gaze so deeply in your eyes, the brief moments connection where there is no you or I, just one heart beating betwixt you? It’s the moment you know you are no longer looking for love, love is all there is. That is living passionately.

9. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? – Would I quit working all together, I couldn’t possibly, my brain would suffocate, my hands have to be busy, I crave to create. But, I actually would quit my job and work strictly on my “part time” job, writing. Writing is my passion.

10. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? – I wouldn’t want to know, I just wouldn’t want to know. I hope I visit these people, or speak, or correspond with them enough now so they know I love them. But if there was a finality to life, let it pass with my head in the clouds because the anticipation of the tragic moment would mar, darken the final meeting to some unrecognizably, grotesque visage of what our relationships were.

11. What do you feel is the difference between being alive and truly living? – Being alive is simple, you eat, breathe; simply consume a space in an environment. In truly living you live with all of your senses. You taste the stars, feel the music, smell the nuances of love, you hear the smile, the whimsy, of the things around you, and your eyes behold the hearts of those about you.

12. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? – I think being afraid to make a mistake is a societal (mis)cue. When we are raised by doting parents and though the norm, it is not necessarily the wherewithal. Some of the greatest parents in the world have the intuitive sense to let their children fail, (and in my case, oft fail miserably). They choose to not “help” them all the time, to overly protect them from life or censure, so their children learn to accept they will sometimes fail and when they do, they learn from the mistake. For the love all, please realize, letting both teams win is not helping children, it creates a false sense of expectancy. Because honestly, I believe, the most important thing a parent can teach their child is to teach them not to need them (the parent).

13. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? – I’d be more me and less me at the same time. Heck, I reckon I need to keep it right there.

14. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? – Learn everything and anything you can, because intelligent knowledge can solve problems, create peace, teach compassion and move worlds.

Take from? Yes. That was most definitely Cao’s Word and Peace, as my little dragon likes to call it. But seems to me today it’s allowed because the totally cool Strawberry Singh (http://strawberrysingh.com/ ) said so and I figure that makes it all okay. Have a wonderful week!

Dress Information:

♬ Singer Icon Fair 2 ♬
November 11 – 30, 2013
Theme: Style of famous singers or music

[[Masoom]] Booth Slurl: http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/X%20BrEeDeRs%20Market/223/229/23

10 thoughts on “Deep Thoughts in the Shallow End of My Mind

  1. these questions are sceeery….. I admire you for answering them. I especially like this phrase: “At this point, I’ve lived with me so long I can find happiness in my quiet seriousness.” – you have a way with words girl ❤

      1. I wish I could write like you. English is my second language so I often feel somehow shallow when I try to express myself. So I often hesitate to write profound postings… and sometimes my typos becomes totally insane when I try to be serious, as u know 🙂 ♥

      2. I had no clue English wasn’t your first language, you speak it so well! I thought the typo was just that, a typo. Like I do 24/7 lol. I tell my friend Draakje sometimes I think I had a stroke. 😉

      3. oh u didnt hear my accent? 🙂 well that was a typo and a good one too. The android spell for me too sometimes 😉 I think I fail mostly when it comes to grammar? Hard to tell as I dont always see it myself and ppl are too polite.

      4. hehe sometimes I voice chat instead of typing on my cell phone when I text. erm. I’ve had some epic fails because I have an accent. One day I figure I’ll be talking along, look down at what I’ve said so far and the cell phone will come up with “uncle” 😀

  2. You know I rarely miss a Monday Meme, but I was seriously considering giving this one a pass. It makes my head hurt to think this hard about me. But my lil Cao has given me another argument “for” while I churn the “against” around with a cup of coffee.

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