“I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?” — Jean Illsley Clarke
As we move deeper into our relationships, it is common to begin to see partners as an extensions of us. We become bound together as a couple and an illusion of connection forms. As this happens, the quality of our relating to one another deteriorates. Just doesn’t seem right does, it? One problem with seeing our partners as extensions of ourselves is that it becomes much easier to be hypercritical of them in the same way we are hypercritical of ourselves due to our self-doubts. If they do something that we think is embarrassing, for instance, WE feel ashamed. Please stop wearing white socks with casual loafers! Actually I have a guy friend from Ohio who does that all the time, it’s a hoot! But I digress, seeing your partner as a reflection on you not only builds up resentment and pressure, it also kills your ability to see them realistically. Another problem is that in forming bonds we often lose sight of the other person as a separate individual and begin overstepping their boundaries and they begin to feel taken advantage of and stepped on. It is very important to recognize your partner as a separate person with their own thoughts and feelings. Oh, and abilities, every time I start to do something Taylor comes along and takes over, I’ve even been known to yell, “I can do it myself grandma” like I did to my real grandma back when I was 3 and potty training. Acknowledging this person as their own separate entity can only strengthen the relationship for the better. I mean, I don’t know about you, but I’ve certainly been in the fight where I want to be right at all costs, even when his explanation makes perfectly good sense. Have you ever done that, or am I the only crazy one? yeah I know, it’s just me.
The thing is, most fights and crumbling foundations of relationships can be “saved” by uttering three simple words. I know what you are thinking, not those, they just add pressure to the situation because the other person may not feel like they love you so much right then, the other three simple words are, “you’re probably right.” If it’s a battle that doesn’t have to be won at all costs, what’s wrong with letting your partner be right every once in a while? I don’t know, what’s wrong with it either, but I am going to try and remember this… next time. Hey! I was right! Anyway, you know the drill, take what I said for what it’s worth to ya, just running off at the keyboard.
I’ve been checking out some newer designers the past couple days and will be blogging them here soon. #He La#, which I am wearing now is one of them. And just so you can check them out, I even included a taxi for you! Taxi: Yeah, I’m kinda nice like that. Good Cao!
Hair: Zibska, Patience
Jewelry: (Kunglers Extra), Eliza @ The Cosmopolitan Room event
Dress: #He La#, A Thought Dress (ornament)
Pose: Dream Print
Hair: Lelutka, Salome
Jewelry: (Kungler’s Extra), Finrod Earring & Elwen Necklace
Dress: #He La#, Premonition
Bag: Epoque, Mortier
Glasses: Dumani, Cateye
Pose: Dream Print